Daily Mail Tells You How To Survive The Apocalypse

Daily Mail gives you the skinny:

There are certain things city dwellers can do in preparation for a sudden disaster

People should plan on staying in their homes and cities in most scenarios

It’s recommended to have enough water and non-perishable food for three days, a flashlight, batteries, a first aid kit and a solar charger for your phone…

Finally, Renne recommends having a positive attitude and maintain calm, as becoming anxious can become dangerous when facing obstacles.

I do notice a lot of people using the word Apocalypse lately. It is almost as if everyone thinks something not just bad, but worse than we can possibly imagine, is coming.

So their advice is, whatever you do, do not let your amygdala light up. They’d have been better off saying to have a cyanide pill on hand. Picture the Stock Crash of ’29, only with a myriad of violent street gangs and millions of single-fathered diverse vibrants, and using this advice. From the moment of the crash you may have three days to go all Snake Pliskin and make for the city border. Anything longer and you might as well slather yourself in a nice soy-sauce marinade, out of consideration for the cannibals who are going to feast on you – and especially your lower leg, which they view as the human equivalent of a drumstick:

The truth is, if you are in the city, this Daily Mail article is probably the most humane advice. Keep the faith, stay happy, and tell yourself you are going to make it, right up until the moment you are killed and BBQ’d to feed the diverse and vibrant masses. I would not have advocated for the flashlight, batteries, first aid kit, or the cell phone chargers though, since when the diversified vibrants are done with the city dwellers they will be trying to move outward into the suburbs and the countryside.

Best that by the time they get to that, they be stripped of as much gear as possible. Telling the city-folk to keep those things on hand is just going to serve to outfit the vibrant hordes.

Thankfully the rabbits are going to stick with the whole, “Firearms are scary things, and one would probably kill you before it killed anyone else,” but somehow I expect the savages will not be lacking for those when they come.

Spread r/K Theory, because if you are in the city when the Apocalypse begins, you can just put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye

This entry was posted in Amygdala, Apocalypse cometh, Economic Collapse, ITZ, Liberals, rabbitry. Bookmark the permalink.
0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest

15 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Ned Flanders
Ned Flanders
6 years ago

this clip sums it up for urbanites. from episode 1, “Connections” by James Burke.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPcZ_5uCldg
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Connections_(TV_series)

mobiuswolf
Reply to  Ned Flanders
6 years ago

Now that’s funny. He’s relentless. They didn’t believe him then, or couldn’t hear him, they sure won’t now.
Head for the hills folks. 😉

Ron
Ron
Reply to  mobiuswolf
6 years ago

Not anywhere near enough. You need a community of like minded relatives, a bit off the beaten path. You actually need several communities working in the same area.

What a mess.

Ned Flanders
Ned Flanders
6 years ago

pictures from the Rodney King riots. can’t believe this was only 25 years ago.

http://framework.latimes.com/2012/04/19/photos-from-los-angeles-riots/

everlastingphelps
everlastingphelps
6 years ago

I’m really starting to wonder about the three-day thing. None of the recent disasters that point to needing a food supply (specifically the recent hurricanes) have been responded to in three days. It has always been longer. I have lots of ideas of why they could have picked 3 days, but no sure answers.

Is it because 3 days is something people can wrap their heads around and accomplish? Maybe a month or even seven days seems intimidating, but “sure, I can do 3 days”? Is it because they want a giant exodus of people suddenly emerging for food on the third day? Is it because they need three days of relative quiet from law-abiding folks to get themselves out? Is it because they think it takes 3 days to calm down and after that people are too despondent and despairing to grab pitchforks and torches?

mobiuswolf
Reply to  everlastingphelps
6 years ago

I was thinking about that, too. Three days is about what people have on hand anyway, more or less. You might have to eat that can of sardines with the hot sauce. Anything serious and three days worth is enough to keep you in place for a bit. “Hunker down and wait for help.” Expendables, is what it is.

Pitcrew
Pitcrew
6 years ago

Optimism is cowardice

mobiuswolf
Reply to  Pitcrew
6 years ago

Heh. No, I’m pleased as punch ITZ coming sooner than later. My grandchildren can live in a different world. Very optimistic, just lately. 🙂 🙂 🙂

BrachaBenedicta
BrachaBenedicta
6 years ago

Ah, how edifying! Well, I guess we are going to spend time decorating our big-city abode now, and explain to our kids how much fun it is to be cooked for dinner.

We don’t have the ability to leave the city at this time.

Oh well, I guess we won’t make the cut then.

mobiuswolf
Reply to  BrachaBenedicta
6 years ago

It’s cheap to live in the country, just no jobs. Look further out than people want to live.

Pitcrew
Pitcrew
6 years ago

High trust society vs. Low trust society
Chinese elementary school math quiz
comment image

Robert What?
6 years ago

When the apocalypse hits, it will behoove all the K’s to bust down the gates of the gated communities to make them more accessible to the vibrants. After all, that’s where all the people who brought on the apocalypse live.

mobiuswolf
Reply to  Robert What?
6 years ago

lol Take the gate, leave the hole.

c_arnold
6 years ago

I think it’s a good idea for the daily mail to tell people to stay put, but to not encourage people in the cities to get to know their neighbors. To not offer suggestions to form building and neighborhood groups, elect block captains and the like shows just how disconnected people are from each other. The apocalypse will be an interesting period.

JimP
JimP
6 years ago

K people will do themselves no disservice by figuring out – in advance of any imminent problems – how to isolate urban areas that threaten to spill over into neighboring areas. Block and guarding bridges, tunnels, etc.

I can’t begin to imagine how bad things would have to be but if it appears inevitable you have to team up with people and game these things out. No need to be overrun if you don’t have too.